Frivolous At Heart

Finally! I have now, an IPOD for my full sadistic & unmoral pleasure=) I love music, though somewhat boring of a genre you might think but I love the type of music that I listen to. Nice and slow, classy, and very boring=) Just my type of music to set the correct mindset.

How did I come of this? Well it started many moons ago when I was promised one and patiently waited until this special day came=) $300 USD later, I’m now free to block out the world around me even more! My friend CHIM purchased it for me- actually he purchased two, one for Jay and another for I. We got free IPODs and are extremely happy for such a blessing! Now we must get to using it which will take us quite a bit of time to learn the curvature of the proprietary Appleware.

It’s silly how I did not know what an IPOD was when Apple first started making them! I was clueless until CHIM updated me. He’s like my key to the hip-hop culture, new gadgets, and the latest gossips. I thank him for such and I thank him even more for my 30GIG IPOD!!! Yay!!!

Check out the photo I stole from Apple (imagine how big my smile was):

I am, for most part, very unemotional. It’s true. I’m unemotional towards everything and everyone. The ones that I actually have at heart feel my warmth tremendously. Like a furnace on a cold blizzard night, I am it. I feel that I’m indifferent and cold at all times but that does not necessarily convey my absolute state towards everything.

She says I’m unemotional and that is why she shall not consider me. True fact- she is right. I shall have no one pick me like a fruit basking in the sun at the market. I am not compared to a fruit nor am I one up for consideration from the masses. I hold high above where it’s low. I shall not be construed as a man without passion because I’m a blossom only needing little coaxing for full bloom. That which she shall not find out for she opens to me not!

To have her think that of me is very inconsiderate considering how I’m a shadow during the day and wind during the night. I’m as light as a thought yet mean so little. How will she ever find out if she, herself, does not embrace me? So choosing, I’m not important nor doe she care for me as a friend, to have second thoughts.

I ask of nothing from her. She refuses, denies and revokes me but still I press on as a loyal friend and care for nothing else than her embrace as a fellow friend. Being a friend to her is an up hill climb or so she makes it that way. She tends to make things complex rather than looking at the facts and blessing them. My friendship comes with no intention in hopes of escalating our friendship to more intimate planes.

I’m passionate about her. She once said she was intimidated and afraid of me. Why? Magical powers I assume. I’m only a plain man with plain powers- the power to associate, create, and love fervently. It seems she builds walls around herself because she is afraid. Fortified and lost. The veil is her phone. Passion seems to travel from her phone to mine like an aroma that makes your thoughts sizzle with intellect. It feels as though she is a different person while on the phone. She expresses her self and falters like anyone else. She is afraid to show
passion face to face for she is afraid of my starring into her heart.

I conclude that I’m unemotional but never to her. It seems that I am but only because she revokes me and is afraid of what might proceed next. Why be afraid of me and drift farther from this? You’ll find me in the same spot you have left me.

Generally speaking, to have someone at heart is to look after that person’s good interest at all times. I would have to admit, you can’t hold the particular person’s hand through everything in life but that is not what I’m trying to get across.

To be a friend and I dont mean “hi-bye” ones either but true good friends means to look after that person’s interest. Literally speaking everyone is looking out for themselves and we do this naturally. Once this has been accomplished, you should have the common courtesy to look after your friend or many friends.

For example, taking someone else’s slack when you know they are not able. Or taking notice that someone needs a certain something and you go out of your way to get it for them when you know darn well they are not capable of doing so themselves. Doing things you necessarily don’t need to do but you do so because you are friends and friends sometimes rely on others.

Well seeing as how I’ve explained all that, I’d like to say that I have not experienced any kind of oldfashion friendship from a particular person. Not that I request or demand of it but It would be nice sometimes to
feel that you are actually placed at heart by that person. In other words, to know that you actually mean something to that person instead of them just brushing you off.

I know, why still friends with this person? Well I believe everyone deserves chances (if many) to prove me wrong. I hold this person very dear at heart. But she seems to lack the rebound? It’s okay! I have faith in her. I’m very forgiving though I have left her alone for most part because she seems to be uninterested in me as a friend (if we are even friends at all I feel).

I’m away for the weekend here in Palm Beach. Had to be counseled for miscellaneous reasons. Four hour to and another four back. How exciting! It was the only time I actually had time to “listen”, I mean, REALLY listen to my jazz and classical music. Yo Yo Ma seems to frequent the classical station more and more lately.

I really like Yo Yo Ma- a great cellist and artist. You probably know of his music in the movie Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. The piece you are most familiar with is probably The Eternal Vow. I feel so weak emotionally when I listen to Yo Yo Ma. There is so much passion that affliction has little meaning to me. So soothing yet so suicidal. So
grand yet mystifying.

I feel as though my soul plays the same rhythm and beckons for answersfrom sources not so willing. The piece has an uncanny and irresistible connotation provoked by the title and answered in riddles by the tunes. I’m in love with the.

Well, I would like to start off by letting others know that I’m so very happy! My friend has snagged a friend;) They are dating now! It’s interesting, during their courtship that is, that he had so many common feelings of emptiness and was lost if not confused.

I was there for him and I’ve probably heard him belch an earth full of cries and whimpers alike. He was complaining like a little sissy but all is well because he isn’t confused anymore. I’m so glad and thrilled for him! Now I’ll see less and less of him around here. O how they grow so fast! My one of many minions will retire in hibernation for quite some time.

All is well! Many praises to the ones higher than I! The feelings are mutual. To have someone look upon you with dignity and harness lust with spirit abound is inspiring.

It’s funny how life chides us at the moment we are most feeble. I felt that urge to just let go.., and I did quite so unwillingly. I do not know how to start nor do I know how to finish *thoughts*.

Beautiful had interest in someone or thought someone was “hot”. Of course, I supported her and urged her to speak to him. I know for most part, anyone with common caliber would have been sad and felt a little angry. I know of many kinds that justify this well. I don’t blame someone for feeling all is lost and nothing will come of it. For matter of fact, I have apathy for those that are selfish and inconsiderate of such matters.

Likewise, I do not know why I was so supportive of her and can only imagine what she would have felt if I wasn’t. She needs no acknowledgement nor does she need rights to lust for others she feels compelled and or attracted to. It’s only natural for someone to define and refine their tunes to someone with rhythm.

We got to talking and she asked I, If I had still so desired her… Of course it’s obvious I still lust with fiery for fairies without questions. I don’t remember the exact phrases that we both had exchanged but I know she was sad she can not give forth what I had desired.

She should not feel sad for me but feel thrilled to find someone attractive to her. Be sad without reason is with reasons conjured from your soul is beautiful. Who shall be sad for you when you are without light? No one will, so you must take stand and be sad for no one. Step on (quite a few) toes and voice your thoughts freely, for not doing so, you will be cornered and flanked by your hind quarters. Lust (added) with pressure- I’m immune, are you?

I see that speckle of happiness within her and I am enamored. To be appointed to such charm is well worth my own happiness. I do not see such true happiness in a lot of people whom I meet during my drift. If she is happy than I shall be happy for her. My emotions towards her is like a light switch. She requests that we are ONLY friends and so I accept it; however, my desire, encapsulated within it’s own bubble, for her can not be turned off.

I have a six inch diameter cylinder candle that contains three wicks.It’s burgundy I suppose from the images
given below. Well I had lit the candle for many days on ends and burn it did! I find myself guessing “why does
one wick stop burning?”- the other two wicks are fine and burns with fiery. Ah?, it is drowning in it’s own pool of waxy fuel.

As you can see the photos below, it’s obvious that the interior or the “gut” as I call it, was being slowly excavated by the searing heat provided by the three lit wicks. It’s actually caving in itself and doing more harm than good (lighting my room for that O fuzzy feeling).

My solution: Cut it! I didn’t know it took such muscles and breath. I found muscles aching where I had originally thought didn’t exist? Ironic! Yup, I consider that deed quite handy! Check it out!

Well, our yard isn’t too impressive like many others like
us;) We decided to do something about it and got concrete
borders done professionally to finish off our yard! I must
say, it’s quite dazzling! Now I’m going to go buy a lot of
greens and try to plant them? yah!!! Check out the photos
below- you will like them as much as I do.. Enjoy!

Well we all know that toner is expensive and I happen to have a Brother HL-1440 Laser Printer. I have to admit,
going laser saves you so much money on ink cartridges. With our economy going so GREAT (yeah…), we can
usually pick up an ink jet printer for less than 50USD. The ironic thing is…these things pack two ink cartridges
each being 20-45USD each! That is more than the cost of the printer! So my friend said once, “Why buy ink
when you can go out and buy another printer for 30USD with a rebate?”, of course, this makes great sense and it’s the logical thing to do!

Well, I figured with all the money I throw in ink alone, I could have purchased myself a nice laser printer- so I did
just that! Sure, 6,000 pages before the toner runs out but that’s fine-N-dandy until you have to replace it! The toner alone, cost 100+USD and I chose to refill my toner instead! Two refills cost about 25USD + elbow grease. I didn’t really include the whole instructions on how to do a refill but this should give you and idea. To do this successfully, I recommend a funnel and a vacuum. Surprisingly, when I was done, the laser printer printed very nice and streak free documents! Enjoy!

An amazing play! The performance and cast did an

outstanding job! The play was rich in flavor and O
so romantic. I guess I live my life through theatrical
performances! Sometimes it makes me wonder if
I’m fit for such closure. My Fair lady had “zing and
zang” and “umph” throughout the whole performance!
Professor Henry Higgins and Eliza Doolittle made the
whole set fall in place and swept me off my feet.
Their love and affection was not tangible to say the
least but you knew it was there even though Professor
Higgins tried so hard to conceal it- he consumed
himself with his outright scheming personality!
I really enjoyed this-